Excellent. I enjoy the fact that you explore the characters in the alternate history. It reminds me of a science fiction/alternate history I read called
Guns of the South. If I ever do a timeline, I'll probably use a similar format.
One thing however. Could you use paragraphs better in this? For example, instead of this:
June 13th, 1784 Jefferson is woken up by his 11 year old daughter Martha at 6:45 am. Jefferson: Martha, sweetie, I thought I told you never to wake me up this early on Sundays. You know I’m not very religious.” Martha: I know father, but there is a crazy man outside who wants to see you!” Jefferson goes downstairs and the first thing he sees is: James Madison? Jefferson: “James, what the bloody hell are you doing here?” Madison: “Remember how I told you about “the plan”?” Jefferson: “My god you’ve lost it. People told me you were going crazy in that study of yours, now I’m inclined to believe them.” Madison: “You don’t understand, this is REVOLUTIONARY!!! This is the most revolutionary thing since the Declaration of Independence!” Jefferson: “My god…….” Madison: “I know how much this means to you Thomas, that is why I come to you first and foremost. Nobody loves this country more than you Thomas, except maybe George Washington….but I fear his time on this earth is limited.” Jefferson: “Okay, do you have “the plan”?” Madison: “Yes”. Jefferson: “Alright, let’s take a look.”
Do this:
Much easier to read this way. Otherwise, great timeline.
